How do you balance work and home life?
Today’s writing prompt is all about that work/life balance, and I feel like this is definitely something I can talk about, because it’s something I’ve struggled with for years (and, you know, I have a job!). I’m not entirely talking about the past half decade before I re-entered the workforce, but I’ve generally been working since I graduated from high school. I started out in restaurants working as a dishwasher, a line-cook, and so on and so forth, and I didn’t really have a lot of trouble maintaining my sense of self, and the life that I had outside those walls.
But something changed.
Sometime at the age of thirty-six, my identity as a person started to shift, and started feeling like it’s been bungled around. I started to feel like I’m not really a person with goals and things that I enjoy outside the job. I started seeking out new interests, new hobbies, looking for anything to fill in this void where I felt my sense of self should be.
This continued for a long period of time. My life became working, and laying on the couch at home waiting until it was time to get back to working. This became habitual for well over a year, and my sense of identity continued to gradually slip away (I have considered that my issues and turmoil over transition may be part of this).
I stayed that way for so long, that eventually I began to feel trapped, hopeless, like nothing mattered, and that there was no point in continuing to be, if all I am is a worker who sleeps, and then clocks back in.
But, instead of seeking out harm, something inside my mind switched around six months ago. Yes, six months ago to this date.
I started focusing less on when it was time to clock back in, when it was time to get ready, when it was time to sleep, and just started focusing more on what’s happening in each moment. I made myself, no, forced myself to be present in what I’m doing in the now, rather than what I’d be doing once I return to the job that, for all intents and purposes, is not something I wholeheartedly enjoy. Who actually really enjoys their job, unless they’re a millionaire who can vacation six times a week?
But, if you want to talk things I enjoy, you need only look to my writing, my music, and the things I make in virtual worlds.
I’m still working on rediscovering who I am, and maintaining my sense of self. But this is why having a healthy work and life balance is extremely important. It’s not just about leaving yourself time to take care of home-chores. It’s not just about leaving time for other people to be part of your life. It’s also about giving yourself time … to exist. To be a person, with wants, and needs, and interests, that have nothing to do with what the corporation you work for wants or desires.
You need this, because if you don’t give yourself these things, you will end up where I was. Stuck in a void of thought, in a rut, spiraling out of control without even knowing it.
You have to be present. I’m not talking about putting the phone down and staring at the wall (although meditation is definitely also good for you). Use your phone if you want! Post on social media! But be who you are, in those moments, and don’t tumble so easily into the work you do for a living, becoming the only identity you have. I don’t want to say, “It will become deadly.” But I went so far to a place that I didn’t want to be, that my mind became numb.
Focus on maintaining this balance today. Don’t tell yourself you’ll start tomorrow, or next week. Start right now.
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